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| BANNED IN CHARLESTOWN! (c) iseeum |
Hard on the heels of the Town Council's March 14th vote to kill wind power development in town, the May 5 Town Council agenda shows that they plan to kill it again. Ill Wind RI, our stalwart local NIMBYs, feels the March 14th version of the wind turbine ban is too lax - e.g. the set-back is only 3-to-1, meaning that if a fallen turbine bounces more than three times, somebody could get hurt. So let's make the set-back 7-to-1. Or 100 miles.
Also, the Town Council plans to bring this ordinance to a re-vote every couple of months just to keep the no-winders fired up and to earn their approval every time they vote for it.
But no problem. Charlestown no-winders plan to revive the 1978 nuclear power plant proposal. Town residents defeated that project which would have put the nuke roughly where the wind turbines are slated to go. Charlestown no-winders hope to lure the two mega-watt 50-year old nuclear reactor at the URI Bay Campus to Ninigret, since some folks in Narragansett are nervous about having an old nuclear reactor in their neighborhood.
Moving the URI nuke down US 1 from Narragansett to Ninigret will have a serious impact on traffic, however.
Other Earth Day events in Charlestown:
Feral Cat Hunt. Ruth Platner will lead intrepid Charlestownians on a bird-saving crusade to hunt down C-town's feral cat population. Though the cats are wily, they are known to hang around the homes of elderly residents.
Astroturf ground-laying. To restore our world renowned Town Driving Range back to the condition that made it a vacation destination, Town Council members will roll out the first bale of astroturf.
Nature Walk. CCA board member Virginia Wooten will conduct a nature walk for kids to feed the rats and skunks that inhabit the pristine wilds and derelict buildings of the abandoned YMCA camp on Watchaug Pond. Truly a wonder of nature that must be preserved for future generations!
Ground-breaking. Did you know that Charlestown has a spot that is almost 250-feet above sea level? Well, we do and it's located in the middle of the farm owned by CCA founding members Cliff Vanover and Ruth Platner, off Biscuit City Road. Some less-enlightened people might think that such a spot would be a great place for a wind turbine, but faggedaboudit! Instead, you're looking at the future location for South County's first manure-burning power plant. Call it biomass, call it renewable, call it cutting edge. The plant itself will be built in the traditional village concept and the smoke stack will be made from a hollowed-out, clay-lined 100 foot oak. As for getting the plant approved by the Planning Commission, that may not be a problem.
Pot causes global warming. In the future, Ruth and Cliff's manure plant could also be used to burn marijuana plants and pot confiscated by town police (especially during the Reggae Festival). According to a new report that I am NOT making up, marijuana cultivation consumes 1% of US energy output and releases 17 million metric tons of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. And, again I swear I'm not making this up, this doesn't count the exhaled smoke. So using pot as an alternative fuel in Ruth and Cliff's no-bull power plant will help restore harmony to our planet, not to mention giving their neighbors a nice second-hand buzz.
Author: Will Collette
