When Nature Calls

Some of the opponents of the beach facilities referendum (approved by Charlestown voters on June 6) were in serious denial about what happens when people just gotta go.

They wrote e-mails to CCA, which CCA dutifully passed on, claiming to be baffled at why people who come to the beach might need toilet facilities. Why indeed?

Well, a valuable teachable moment comes to us from New London’s recent experiences with its new “Whale Tail” sculpture-fountain. This impressive piece of art is a focal point for New London’s waterfront/downtown renewal.

But town officials have had to turn off the water driving the fountain when beach goers found other uses for it.  

"People are using the tail as a latrine,'' city resident Evelyn Louziotis told the New London Day. "It's an $11 million bathroom."

The fountain has been used as a urinal, a place to rinse off beach sand and on at least one occasion, a place to defecate.

Maybe we should send a team of advisors over to New London to show them our $1.2 million alternative to their $11 million problem, and explain the simple truth that “when ya gotta go, ya gotta go.”