A CCA bedtime story
By Linda Felaco
Once upon a time, there were three little piggies. One piggy
built a house North of One, the second piggy built a house on Watchaug Pond,
and the third piggy built a house South of One.
The North of One piggy didn’t build a very fancy house.
Instead, he and his wife had a couple of little parasite piggies that they sent
to the Chariho schools, which cost the other two piggies a lot of bacon.
This made the other two piggies really mad. One of them even
went to the superintendent of schools and told him the school budget was too
high. But the superintendent said, “No, the budget is just right.”
Now, the Watchaug Pond piggy had built his house right on
the pond where his septic system drained straight into the water. And the South
of One piggy had built a very fancy house right on the ocean in a flood zone
that was always in danger from hurricanes.
But the Watchaug Pond piggy and the South of One piggy
didn’t have any little parasite piggies and wrote lots of checks to the nice
Charlestown Citizens Alliance people anytime the CCA was having trouble with
the Narragansett Indians wanting to build senior-citizen housing or do anything
that didn’t benefit the CCA.
One day, toward the end of summer, a big hurricane came
along, and what do you think happened? The nice Charlestown Citizens Alliance
people worked very hard to save the South of One piggy’s house and clean up all
the sand and debris off the roads and make sure he and the Watchaug Pond piggy had
electricity.
Meanwhile, the North of One piggy had to schlep to Town Hall
for buckets of water because he had no electricity to power his well.
Then, when it was time for school to start, the nice
Charlestown Citizens Alliance people said to the children of the North of One
piggy, “We’re sorry, we have no more money for the Chariho schools. We used it
all to buy more land on Watchaug Pond. The chair of the Planning Commission
proved it mathematically that we could keep our taxes lower this way.”
“But don’t worry, little parasite children,” the nice
Charlestown Citizens Alliance people said. “We’re going to give your parents
vouchers to move to Westerly!”
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Read the previous CCA bedtime story: