Budweiser's new squeezed-looking cans short the customer by
nearly an ounce.
Anyone who says that
America has lost its innovative edge in technology and manufacturing hasn’t
chugged a can of Bud recently. The buzz is back, baby!
Well, actually,
Budweiser is no longer American. It’s now part of a Belgian outfit called
Anheuser-Busch InBev, the world’s largest maker of suds.
And the brew crew
overseeing the “King of Beers” knows what we American quaffers want in a beer:
a new and improved can.
Huh?
“We’re consciously working to bring innovation
to the packaging side” of the beer market, he told the St. Louis
Post-Dispatch.
That’s why the corporation’s
container-shapers have devised a “bowtie” can that kinks inward in the middle.
How exciting is that? Plus — get ready to bust your beer gut — there are 8.5 fewer calories in the new can. How did they manage
that?
Well, the bowtie
design allows the multibillion-dollar brew kings to short you by almost an
ounce of beer in every can. But, come on, we experienced hoisters of the
brewer’s art will definitely feel that loss of product, so they can’t fool us
into paying more for less.
Well, that’s where
their innovative genius trumps our consumer instincts. To keep us off balance,
Anheuser-Busch InBev’s bowtie can has nearly doubled the amount of aluminum of
its regular can, making the new feel just as heavy as the old. Less beer, more
metal — that’s heavy innovation, my friends.
Oh, there’s one more
innovative twist. In case some of you trend-seekers try to compare ounces in
the new six-packs, you’ll find that the bowtie cans only come in eight-packs.
Gotcha again!
If you want honest
beer, try the craft brews at your local pub or store.
OtherWords columnist Jim Hightower is
a radio commentator, writer, and public speaker. He's also editor of the
populist newsletter, The
Hightower Lowdown. OtherWords.org