Never
before could a serious White House contender boast about his complete lack of
qualifications.
By Donald Kaul
We live in a time of stunning transformations. In recent weeks we’ve seen Bruce Jenner transition from a male Olympic medalist to Caitlyn Jenner, a self-assured woman gracing the cover of Vanity Fair.
Then
there’s Rachel Dolezal, the ex-president of the Spokane, Washington chapter of
the NAACP. She lived as a black woman until her parents revealed that she was
not, technically, black. Czech, Swedish, German, and Native American, but not black.
Those
transitions pale in the face of the latest political switcheroo: Donald Trump,
real estate magnate and reality TV star, is now a proper politician. In case he
did this too quietly for you to notice, he’s officially running for president.
This
spectacle reminds me of an old story. Jack Warner, the head of Warner Brothers
Studios, hears that Ronald Reagan, one of his former contract actors, is going
to run for governor in California.
“No,
no,” says Warner, mistaking the news for a film pitch. “Jimmy Stewart for
governor. Reagan for best friend.”
I wish Warner were still with us. He might say something like: “No, no. Tom Hanks for president. Trump for court jester.”
For
years, Trump has been content to serve as the nation’s favorite buffoon billionaire.
Time and time again, in word and deed, he’s embarrassed himself without ever
seeming embarrassed.
His
announcement speech alone would have mortified a meeker man. On and on it went.
In addition to slandering all Mexican immigrants and boasting about how he
underpays website developers, Trump blurted out: “I beat China all the time.”
And
to be fair, he’s laughed all the way to the bank. To put it mildly — which he doesn’t
— he has a talent for making money. When he isn’t losing it.
The
Donald has filed for bankruptcy four times, always seeming to come out richer
than before. He’s earned a reputation as someone whose handshake on a deal
requires a careful count of one’s fingers afterwards.
Until
now, Trump had merely threatened to run for president. This time around he
seems to be doing it for real — even though his most enthusiastic supporters at
the kick-off event were actors, as Hollywood Reporter observed. They
were paid $50 for their maniacal cheering.
Other
candidates have broken barriers on race, creed, and gender. The Donald is
registering another first.
It’s
hard to find a serious previous or current contender without even a scintilla
of a qualification. Sure, some of the other dozen or more GOP hopefuls have no
chance at victory. Can you say President George Pataki without cracking up?
But
at least that guy is New York’s former governor. Trump is bumping the bar to a
new low while raising a great question: What are the proper qualifications for
president?
Do
we want someone smart (but not too smart)? With the common touch (but not too
common)? Is broad experience in government (but not too broad) essential?
I
suppose the answer is that we never know it until we see it. Even then, it
often turns out to be the wrong choice.
Take
experience. In the past 50 years the two presidents who exceeded all others in
that department were Richard Nixon and Lyndon Johnson.
They’d
each served in the military, in both houses of Congress, and as vice
presidents. Their resumes were immaculate. Yet they both crashed and burned
once in office.
And
who was smarter than Jimmy Carter? He was a nuclear engineer for crying out
loud. He’d been a liberal governor of a conservative state. And while he’s got
a stellar record as a former president, his presidency was lackluster.
Then
there’s Barack Obama, a whiz kid who can give a great speech and is a good guy
besides. It’s been a rocky trip for him and a disappointment for his strongest
supporters.
Do
what you want to, but you vote for Trump at your own risk. Don’t blame me if
you wake up one day to find a statue of The Donald sitting on Abe’s lap in the
Lincoln Memorial.
OtherWords
columnist Donald Kaul lives in Ann Arbor, Michigan. OtherWords.org.