Why Donald Trump’s Supporters Stay with Him No Matter What
By Harper West and Bandy X. Lee
By Bill Bramhall, New York Daily News |
Notably, how do we help the
Republican Party break up with the abusive personality that has held the GOP in
a cult of personality for the past five years?
Extracting individuals from an abusive relationship or members from a gang or cult involves similar psychological interventions.
These are difficult situations because it is not a matter of speaking about facts or appealing to logic. Victims of abuse and cult members are emotionally “hooked” into the relationship or organization, making removal very difficult.
This explains why
abuse victims so often stay in toxic relationships far longer than they should,
given what may be obvious to outsiders about the harm that is being done to
them.
Seducing Victims
The problem begins with the start of the relationship. Abusers and antisocial personalities are often very skilled at emotionally seducing victims into their web of coercion and control. In interpersonal relationships, this is often labeled the idealization phase, or “love bombing,” because the abuser turns on the charisma and charm to make their target feel special and adored.
She enjoys
the love and attention and bonds with the abuser emotionally. It is usually
only later that the emotionally or physically harmful behavior begins, and by
then the victim has already invested too much in the relationship to pull out
easily.
Donald
Trump, of course, loves his rallies because he gets his narcissistic supply,
but also because he can make his followers feel special at these events and
bind them to him. The chanting of phrases such as, “Stop the Steal,” the
flag-waving, and the wearing of paraphernalia all act to bond individuals to
the group. In the same way, gangs use “colors”, monikers, tattoos, and
initiation rituals to build loyalty. In poor neighborhoods, belonging to a gang
can make the initiate feel powerful, included, and unique.
Secret
Knowledge
Cult leaders have always used the emotional hook of telling followers that they are in the know and have special knowledge that others do not have. By making an average person feel better about oneself, the leader ensures not only an adoring fan to boost his own emotional needs, but the follower also gets to feel good about oneself.
In abusive relationships, this pattern appears when
the perpetrator says things like: “No one will love you like I can,” or “Only I
can fix things.”
The
problem is, this toxic bond makes de-coupling Trump and his MAGA-hat followers
more difficult. These are not just voters who lost an election, but they are at
risk of losing the feelings of grandiosity and entitlement that assuaged their
feelings of inferiority. Giving that up will be like an addict giving up a
drug.
This
is why the disastrous bungling of a pandemic does not matter. The United States
has 1160 times the death rate of South Korea, when we have only 6 times the
population, and 5 times the average death rate of the world, which includes all
low-income countries with few resources. Still, Trump received votes in larger
numbers in 2020 than in 2016.
Cuckolding
His Followers
This is also why his attempts to overturn democracy and the will of the people only fire up their support. Trump blitzed the nation with baseless claims that a “rigged election” robbed him of victory, filed five dozen frivolous lawsuits, and incited violence when the Supreme Court rejected his bid to overturn Biden’s victory.
Still, they cheer him on, without ever imagining that he is
cuckolding them for his benefit, causing them to send him enormous amounts of
money and even be ready to go to battle for him.
Those who are especially susceptible to abusers’ luring and predation are those who have been victimized in the past: “the forgotten men and women.” Eventually, the magnitude of the deception conspires with their psychological protection against pain to cause them to avoid seeing the truth.
It is much easier to
believe that the person to whom one has pledged undying devotion is worthy of
such fealty, than to face the fact that one has been defrauded. Psychological
abuse is powerful, and perhaps the most pernicious form of abuse, as it takes
over one’s agency and critical faculties.
Interrupt
a Dysfunctional Cycle
Clinicians often have to break the powerful spell of false reality the abuser has cast by highlighting the negative aspects of the relationship.
In the same way, the correct course of action against Trumpism is to interrupt this dysfunctional cycle, not to indulge it. We have both written about the psychological benefits of holding Trump and his co-conspirators accountable through the rule of law.
If
Trump is brought to justice, he will no longer appear so grand. His followers
will be disappointed, but it will break the spell they have fallen under. The
MAGA crowd will be forced to acknowledge that they, too, are not so special and
part of an inner circle of power and knowledge. Reality may be difficult to
face, but it is the first step to recovery and restoration of health.
Merely having Trump out of the White House will help break the spell. In addition, the news media should cease giving him exposure, other than to cover major developments, such as an arrest or court appearance.
Disconnecting from
narcissistic abusers so that they no longer gain attention and relevance is a
primary method of combating their dangers. Then, emotional support and
education will be necessary to prevent former cult followers from latching onto
another abuser.
Holding
Trump accountable is essential, not just to help prove that the rule of law
still matters, but to help release his cult followers from the abusive
relationship they are victims of. They may not recognize it now, but they are
in an abusive relationship, and it is our responsibility as a country to
expose the cult-like arrangement as destructive and dangerous to our citizenry
and our democracy.
Harper
West, M.A., L.L.P. (harperwest.co) is a licensed psychotherapist,
award-winning author and developer of self-acceptance psychology. Both she and
Dr. Lee (bandylee.com) spoke at the recent town hall, “The Continuing Dangers of Donald
Trump.”